Every divorce is different.
For the lucky few, the end of their marriage is a mutually agreed-to parting of ways, with no hard feelings on either side. But for far too many others, a divorce is a wrenching experience that leaves a profound sense of loss and grief. Whatever the reasons behind your split, it is important that in addition to arming yourself with an experienced and compassionate attorney, you also equip yourself with emotional resources that will support you and help you heal. Seeking help from a patient counselor is always a good idea, as they can provide you with invaluable coping strategies that will see you through your toughest days.
There are several different ways to approach the sense of loss that a divorce can create. You must acknowledge your feelings, as well as that you focus on yourself and your sense of identity. Many people define themselves through their partner or the mere fact that they are part of a couple. The strategies that will help you the most are the ones that will rebuild your self-esteem and help you create a positive vision for a new future.
In addition to professional therapists, other resources and strategies can help, and you should not be shy about pursuing them. They include:
- Seeking the support of family and friends
- Joining a support group that will provide you with shared understanding and a sense of community
- Take care of your physical health by getting regular exercise, high-quality sleep, and eating a healthy diet. If it helps, seek the services of a personal trainer, dietitian, or coach. You will be amazed at how much better you feel emotionally when you feel good physically.
- Pursue activities that you’ve always enjoyed or been interested in exploring. Read, return to old hobbies, or take up new ones. Research has shown that creative endeavors go a long way to restoring a sense of purpose and satisfaction.
If you have children, their mental health and wellbeing adds another dimension to your stress and anxiety. Be sure to communicate with your kids, reassuring them that they are loved by both of their parents and that everything will be okay. The more consistency you can provide to them, the more confident they will be.
Though divorce can be challenging, it can also open new doors and opportunities. Look to the many examples of others who you know who have gone through the process and come out stronger, and seek their guidance and support.